I’m that Woman!

The world events contained in the past few weeks have had me in reflection mode. The COVID-19 pandemic has caused the world to push pause on life. Life as we all have known it to be is so different now. Everyone has had to adjust to a new normal in one aspect or another. Some parts-shelter in place ordinances, bans on mass gatherings, the inability to visit loved ones in hospitals and medical facilities, quarantines, social distancing, home schooling for our children and working from home or being displaced all together are temporary; and others are indefinite, such as the grieving process for that which has been lost, and medical professionals and essential workers sacrificing for the greater good of the whole.

Fear has many people paralyzed in a trance of despair, because life has changed so drastically for everyone, in what seems to have been an overnight process. The fate of each day is seen to be in the hands of higher powers, instead of our very own. Loss is being shared all over the world in one aspect or another. Some are very personal, because they involve the death of loved ones, friends and co-workers, and even our livelihood. Then there are groups of people who seem to be unfazed by what’s going on, because they have not been touched in a major way. However, the spirit of empathy has allowed humanity to band together in hope for better days, as the reality of our personal truths reach the surface of mass media, touching the collective.

What is going on in the world?

Over the past few weeks, as the changes of each day have been unfolding, I went within. I thought back to when I was going thru the most painful transitions in my life. Life as I had grown to know and accept it was slowly being stripped away from me daily. I remember being in a dark and ugly place, that was taking a toll on my mental health and will to live. I had lost all hope and I didn’t have the coping skills to deal with the changes I was experiencing. I got to a point where I realized my life would never be the way it once was, and I would have to put my faith in a higher power, God, to navigate my new normal day by day. My recent reflection also allowed me to see my greatest downfall in my transitions was the realization I had lost the most important person in my life…me!

What is it about us women that makes us think we have to be superwoman?

I had made a life out of being everything to everyone, and when life as I knew it began to fall apart, so did I. At that point, I felt I had no other choice but to keep on moving like everything was good, because allowing the people closest to me to see me broken was not an option! It was as though I was superwoman. Every morning I put on my face, my pumps and my cape, and every night I took it off and cried myself to sleep! That whole routine worked for a short time, and then I got to a place where I just shut down. Life seemed to be going so great for everyone around me. My friends were still happily married or getting engaged, buying new homes, attaining amazing dream jobs in their career, traveling, going on vacation and just living their best life; and then there was me…broken, depressed, divorced, without much money or even a hope or care in the world!

I’m that woman who allowed her roles in life to define the whole of who she was, and the moment I was no longer fulfilling those roles, I felt inadequate, lost and as though I didn’t have anything to substantiate my existence. I made a decision to live and not die, and that meant I had to make a choice even more drastic than my circumstances…I had to put the little bit of faith I had left in me in God.

“Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect. “ Romans 12:2

God is our complete source for everything! Initially, trusting God was hard for me. I was so used to holding my own financially, emotionally and physically, but when the circumstances of my life didn’t allow for me to do that any longer, I tried using my faith, only to realize it is God’s desire for us to trust Him completely with EVERYTHING that concerns us…including our lives!

My life is the poster child for Faith, Power & Purpose!

My reflection of the past few years of my life allowed me to be grateful for all that I have lived thru, and to see that God has been preparing me for this very moment in time all along. I am at peace within. I can find gratitude in the midst of what seems to be so much chaos. I am so thankful for so much, most importantly the ability to see God’s hand in the lives of His children regardless of their perception of what’s currently going on in the world.

God allows us to live thru various experiences as preparation for our next steps and phases in life. When I had no one, God was there. Taking baby steps in trusting God with my life caused me to trust Him completely with every ounce of my being. The awareness that I am enough, and no role in life within a relationship, a career or society will ever be enough to define the true essence of who I am, because I was hand-crafted in the image of unconditional love, giving me the ability to operate fully in my divine power. My divine power has shown me I can manifest so much greatness for the higher good of my life simply by doing what I can to the best of my ability and trusting that God to do what I cannot. Each day I wake up to live a purpose-filled life that keeps me humble simply in knowing without God I am absolutely nothing.

God is my sufficiency therefore I lack absolutely nothing!

Do I have my moments of fear-induced thoughts? Absolutely! and I also cancel them out immediately with the faith-filled promises of God to never leave me, nor forsake me, and to take care of me completely, and even going a step further by giving me the desires of my heart in divine right timing (Psalm 37:4). I don’t know why God allowed the COVID-19 pandemic to manifest, however I do know God has a perfect plan for humanity to prosper and be in good health even as our souls prosper. God never allows us to experience pain without allowing something new to be born. What is that new? I can only tell you it’s something that no eye has seen and no ear has heard, but it will be great things for us all, even if it’s just a collective increase in the awareness that God is real and still in control of the earth and its inhabitants.

I am that woman living by faith, operating in her divine power and living her purpose!

It is my sincere prayer that you release every fear-filled thought that has tried to control the peace of your mind, as you allow your faith to be completely in the uncreated God, only trusting Him to lead and guide you; and protect you from all hurt, harm, sickness and loss, and provide everything you need so you experience no lack, this I pray, Amen.

Blessings, light & love to you💜

  One thought on “I’m that Woman!

  1. Tashawnda
    April 11, 2020 at 1:51 pm

    Amen!

    Liked by 1 person

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