I opened a Facebook page in 2009. Since that time, I have posted my honest feelings tactfully, but of course only those that were “Facebook appropriate.” I believe one should always express his or her open and honest feelings; however I also understand there is a time and place for everything. Therefore, I have never used my Facebook page as a platform to tell someone about my personal feelings, likes, or dislikes for them or a specific situation. Over the past few years, a few major life events have taken place that literally changed me forever. Some changes were expected, like the birth of my youngest child, and others occurred as a result of decisions that I made for my sanity and health; like my decision to leave an unhealthy marriage. With change comes pain. Some pain is minimal, short-lived, and easily forgotten; and other pain is chronic and it is unforgettable because it’s constant and doesn’t seem to have an end no matter what you do to try to ease it. The pain I have experienced the past few years of my life has been chronic. I realized that some changes needed to be made, but I had no idea the time it would take to ease the pain and for the healing to finally begin. With certain situations, like losing a job, it’s painful not knowing how you’re going to pay your bills, take care of a family, and get the money needed to live. With other situations, like deciding to end a marital relationship, it’s painful trying to decide whether to go or stay because either decision still seems to bring pain along with it. I realized I had to figure out a few things before I proceeded with any decisions. I needed to find the source of my pain and I found it to be growing deep within me; my heart to be specific, and spreading in several different directions: my blood, eyes, mind, and body. I knew I had to make a decision soon because I was dying inside. I noticed my heart became hardened because it was working overtime trying to compensate for the hurt it was experiencing every day and the stress of feeling as if I was losing it all. My blood was thinning because it was searching for a healthier source to pump life into my body. My eyes became weak because I was searching for answers through my natural eyes, forsaking what was most important: me. My mind was overcome with worry from the stress of trying to make the best decision for everyone. My body became fragile because it was breaking down from the trauma it was enduring from a weak heart, mind, and soul. I saw the symptoms of that same weak body a couple of months ago as I was scrolling through my past posts on my Facebook page. With each post I read, my body reacted to it as though I was re-living the experience…my mind literally took me back to that place and time! I remember every emotion, sound, tone of voice, smell, and in some cases, tear that went along with the experience that I used a few words to express without going into detail. As I continued to scroll down my timeline, I remember the faith that I reached for just to make it through certain situations. I remember wishing if I just had this or if I just had that, then I would be alright and be able to muster up the strength to make the decisions my mind needed my heart to accept so that my soul would strengthen my body. I remember it like it all happened yesterday! I remember coming to the end of my timeline and looking at the clock and realizing I had spent a couple of hours traveling back in time. The emotions I felt: sadness, depression, anger, hate, animosity, hurt, happiness, and optimism were all running through me at that moment, yet I was no longer physically, emotionally, or mentally in that place in my life. I realized at that moment in time what I was experiencing, and at that same moment I knew I never wanted to experience it again. I lived life in real-time on my Facebook page and every vibration of my past posts still remained on my page. I was holding on to what I no longer was-broken, helpless, scared, and unhealthy, and those vibration were continually being released to me every time I logged on to my page. I did like most people do when they experience a life event; I just changed my status and carried on with my life not realizing there was more to it than that. I essentially experienced a death…part of me died when I got divorced and life as I knew it ended. I just tried to pick up where it left off only to realize I was still holding on in a sense. That night I realized I had to kill those negative vibrations to move to the place; mentally, emotionally, and spiritually, I was focused on going. For me, part of it was deleting my Facebook page and opening a new one just like I had to do in the natural, here on earth. Every ending is a new beginning. You may be thinking, “It’s really not that serious…it’s only Facebook,” but it really is that serious. I understand that everything attached to me has spiritual significance, and nothing happens in the natural without first taking place in the spiritual. Matthew 18:18 says, “I assure you: Whatever you bind on earth is already bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth is already loosed in heaven.” Even though I was no longer married, and I was at peace, I still felt like something was missing. I wanted to be free…and I didn’t understand what it was that had me bound. Scrolling through my Facebook posts that night showed me exactly what it was. I was holding on to a phase of my life that ended and instead of starting anew, I just changed a few things and picked up where I left off because part of me still wanted some of the memories from that time in my life…but I knew I wanted to be free more! I wanted 2014 to start anew…like a clean slate to make room for the newness God has in store for me! I am now fully focused on moving forward with a renewed mind, a healthy body, a thriving heart, new eyesight, and a blessed soul! My 2014 freedom is making way for new relationships, joy, happiness, prosperity, knowledge, greater understanding, and love.
Ask yourself, what is it that you’re holding on to year after year that is preventing you from truly being free. It may be unforgiveness, bad habits, lying, or a hardened heart, which are just a few examples. Let 2014 be the year that you examine the root of the things, situations, emotions, thoughts, and relationships that embody you so that the unseen can be revealed and bless you.
I pray this blog post has touched you in a way that it causes you to make deliberate steps to truly being free to see the unseen, Amen. Please comment on this post to share your thoughts with me and be sure to tell a friend to tell a friend!
Over the next ten weeks, I will be sharing with you the ten things I learned in 2013.
Love, Peace, and blessings to you!!