My Ugly Hair

After the health of my hair began to decline, I decided to cut my hair…I’m

talking real short, shorter than it’s ever been in my entire life! I’ve always had long, thick, healthy hair, and have never had an issue with my hair growing. I’ve put relaxers, permanent hair color, bleach, and semi-permanent hair color in it, and thru it all, it has never broke off or stop growing. In the months prior to “the cut,” I was in a very low place in my life emotionally, mentally, and physically.

It was during that season of my life that I really saw myself for who I was at that moment in my life: weak, broken, and scared. I was so sad, I felt all alone, I didn’t know who I could trust, and I was stuck in a situation I didn’t have coping skills for. I didn’t have an appetite, my stress level was on 10, and as a result I started losing weight, and my hair started to reflect the health of my physical and mental state: poor, dry, thin, and brittle. As I was combing my hair one day, I noticed how damaged it was. My edges were thin, there was more hair in my comb than usual, it was dry, and thin. It was at that moment I decided I was going to cut my hair so I could start over and get my healthy head of hair back!

As planned, I got my hair cut and you couldn’t tell me it wasn’t cute! *HaHa* I loved it! After a few weeks, naturally my hair began to grow, and as a result my new cut was growing out. So I decided to get it cut again, except this time I got it cut much shorter, and as my hair began to grow this time, I decided I wanted to grow it out to the length of a bob. I told my stylist about my plans and she told me it would take about 8 months to grow to the length of a bob. The first month or two, my hair was manageable as it started growing out of the cut, but after a few more months, I didn’t know what to do with it. It didn’t look nice straight (to me) because there was no type of style to it any more. It was too short for me to wrap all of it, so I had to curl my hair everyday-which I hated! This 8 months was waayyy too long to wait for my hair to grow, so I started exploring my options; I could buy a wig and wear it, get a weave, I could get my hair braided or keep getting it cut-none of which I wanted to do. I didn’t want to wear someone else’s hair even if it did come from India! I wanted my own healthy hair back and NOW!!

One day as I was thinking during my quiet time, I got a revelation! I saw a connection between my hair and where I was currently in my life…I was in transition. I realized how damaged my hair was, to the point it didn’t even look like my hair, so I decided to do what was needed to get it back healthy, which was cut it and start over. In my life, I was in a very low place and by the word of God, “My grace is sufficient for you. My strength is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Cor 12:9 I was able to gain the strength to feed the inside of ME back to healthy. In the beginning, with my hair, I loved my new cut and in my life, I loved my new-found place of peace within myself, but when it came time for me to start “growing” aka making moves, the transition, was painful, for a number of reasons; I finally starting utilizing the strength I needed to love myself and that love gave me a new appreciation for ME. I wanted the best for myself, and as I began taking the needed steps, I didn’t feel I was getting the results I wanted fast enough. At times during my transition, I thought about going back to what I had grown to know as my life just so I could be comfortable again, but deeper thought helped me to see if I go back, I couldn’t move forward. My life was on the right track, and although I was growing impatient with the discomfort, pain, and time it was taking, I had to exercise my patience. James 1:4 says, “But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.” That’s what I wanted! I wanted every goal for my life to be perfect upon its completion. God promised me that in his word, “I (The Lord) will perfect that which concerneth me…,” so I chose to be patient knowing at the appointed time, my goals and dreams for a healthy family life, my business, my ministry, my career, true happiness, joy, love and peace shall all manifest…as well as my bob! 🙂

Love&Peace to YOU!

If this post speaks to you, please share your thoughts with me. Tell me how it has encouraged you during the transitional stages in your life?


  One thought on “My Ugly Hair

  1. christopher marcellus
    August 25, 2012 at 8:31 pm

    this is awesome stuff!!! I thank God for you being used to share our own personal feelings concerning the the things we want to be made manifest in life – – NOW! and how we have to be patient for those things, regardless of what they are. thank you!!!

    LOVE – your brother…


    • August 26, 2012 at 1:45 am

      Thank you brother! I’m so thankful I’m able to be used by God to help others!


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