Recently, I was watching an episode of “The Braxton’s Family Values” and Tamar and Trina were teasing each other about the way they talk. Tamar says to Trina, “she (talking about herself) don’t talk like that! Girl, get your life!”
After watching the show, I started thinking about what Tamar said…. “Girl, Get YOUR Life!” Although she said it out of fun, it made so much sense to me! Life…everyone has one in a literal sense… some have more than one because, “you” have allowed them to take yours, and others feel like they don’t have one at all for various reasons. When I think about my life, I realize it’s more than just having my own family, a career with a viable job, friends, and the material things I like: clothes, shoes, jewelry, and nice handbags…those are all accessories, they don’t define me, but for many others, they do. The defining points of YOU and me are all on the inside in our heart, mind, soul and spirit.
What is it on the inside of YOU, that keeps you going every day? At one point in my life, not even 2 years ago, I couldn’t answer that question. I was living for my children, and as I reflect on that time in my life, if it wasn’t for them, I wonder if I would still be living today. I had this feeling of emptiness inside of me because I felt like I was missing so much in my life. I didn’t have joy, and I wasn’t happy, I didn’t feel fulfilled with my home life, my job, my marriage, or what I had in life. So what was going on with me? I didn’t know…but what I did know was I was experiencing a crisis in my life! All I wanted was a fulfilling, peaceful, and happy life, and I didn’t have it. So I started on a new journey in my life to get it.
I began evaluating everything that defined me from the inside and out. I was on a search to find what it was I needed to have peace, love, and joy…permanently. I knew as much as I liked Coach bags and a new pair of pumps, they weren’t going to give me the joy and fulfillment I needed on the inside. I knew it was deeper than that. I felt strongly that the emptiness I was experiencing wasn’t because I didn’t have God in my life, because I had a relationship with God. So, I turned to the bible because I’ve always heard that everything you go thru in life is in the bible. I remember flipping thru the pages of the index looking for fulfillment in relationships, happy marriage, career, and I didn’t see it. I didn’t see how to have a happy home life. I didn’t see how to deal with being unhappy in marriage. I didn’t see what to do about having hurt so deep that all I could do was cry. I didn’t see what to do to get out of debt. I just didn’t see it!! So, I began asking people I knew who could “get a prayer thru” to pray for me because I knew God heard my prayers, but maybe he would answer my prayers quicker if I had intercessors touching and agreeing with me. I needed to get to my place of peace in my life, because the place I was in wasn’t where I wanted or needed to be. I started out on a “new” deeper search for God to help me fill this desert on the inside of me with rivers of a life filled with joy, love, and peace. I believed that the God of Love really cared for me and He would see me thru, and that’s when an intercessor gave me Jeremiah 29:11 to read… “For I know the plans I have for you.” says the LORD. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” It really touched me to know that God had a plan for my life, a good plan, to give me hope and a great future! WoW! That was the breakthrough I needed! From that day on, I began writing down the things I wanted to happen in my life. I began writing my goals on paper and the steps it took to accomplish them. I began to see a little light in the middle of my crisis. It was at that point I knew things were going to turn and begin to work in my favor even if it didn’t happen that day, or the next day or even the next month, I knew that every day God gave me was a gift and as long as I had the gift of life, I had the ability on the inside of me to accomplish that which I set my mind and heart to do.
The peace that I longed for was already within me. I had to make a conscious decision to remove all the negativity and stressors out of my life to have it. The joy I wanted, was already within me, I had to make a conscious decision to say “this joy I have the world didn’t give it to me, so I’m not going to allow them to have it.” The love that I desired, was already on the inside of me, I just had to make a conscious decision to first love myself regardless of how others viewed me and treated me, and then I would be able to have unconditional love.
I started my adult life with my own plan for my life, and even though I thought it was a good plan, when things started to happen that were contrary to it, I was able to deal with it for a while, and then it reached a point where I felt helpless because I didn’t know what to do, or who I could turn to, or where I could go…it truly felt like my life was in a crisis! It was at that point that God had my full attention. I began to pray more, read my bible more, and I also began to get answers to a lot of questions I had. I realized what I was going thru in my life was not for me, but to help many others in the same place I was in. I came to realize my purpose and destiny in life is to edify, uplift, and strengthen women and out of that was birthed “My Solace Place.”
I have come a long way since that time in my life, and I realize I still have a long way to go but I now know the reasons why God allowed me to live thru those experiences. I am honored to be one of God’s chosen vessels and will strive each day to make a difference in the lives of the women God has called me to reach. So I invite you to join me on this journey and…GET YOUR LIFE!
Love & Peace